Dear Friends,
I was so blessed by your blog comments full of compassion and prayers for us. Thank you so very much!
I was especially pulled to the comments made by those who had also experienced miscarriages (some so very recently). You truly do know our pain.
Through the past year with this being my second miscarriage, I have come to realize that a miscarriage is not a one-day event. It covers such a greater time span. There is the time filled with hope before conception…the joy of a pregnancy…the discouragement and fears of complications (for those who know in advance)…the actual miscarriage… the days of healing of heart and body…the 6,7, 8 months following that are marked with the milestones of your pregnancy that are no longer real milestones…the due date…and then, as it slips in here and there, the continual reminders of your little one that you never got to know.
How does one face such pain??? How does one continue on??? Your lives, and the lives of several other women I know, are a testimony of the answer to those questions – by the grace (enabling) of God.
I don’t have any fancy plan for the future, but I know from the past days of this week that God is faithful to care for His children. As I am weak before Him, humbled, empty, then He can work in and through me. Oh if I could only live each day in this way. Starting out knowing I can not face the day on my own strength…not having even the energy to plan out a day…but looking to the Lord for strength, enabling, direction…Looking to my husband and simply following. Oh what a peaceful place that is.
We are taught in I Peter that a meek and quiet spirit are precious in God’s sight. My desire is to allow Christ to work in me through this time of sorrow and to purify my heart to be meek and quiet before Him.
Thank you for praying and for loving all of us!
Melanie
“But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price†(1 Peter 3:4).
Melanie,
You are most definitely in my prayers. You are correct when you say it is a process..not just a one-day event. I had 2 miscarriages (one in 1999 and one in 2001) and I still think of those babies to this day. I am encouraged, however, when I think of what joy it will be to see them when I get to Heaven. I have not gone through nearly as much as you have with your miscarriages and babies but I have been very blessed & encouraged by the testimony you and Nathan have with continuing on in serving the Lord and trusting Him through it all. You will all remain in our prayers!!!
{{{HUG}}}
Blessings,
Vania
Dear Melanie, I ache for you sweetie! I myself am not married, and so have never had a child inside of me, but I can imagine the kind of thoughts and feelings you must be going through right now. My whole family and my friends are praying for you and for Nathan as you go through this difficult time! May the Lord lead you to the verses that will encourage and strengthen you in this time and the months ahead! May He lift your spirits and comfort your heart dear one! 🙂
Love and Hugs!
Your sister in Christ,
~Miss Rachel~
Melanie,
I am so sorry about your loss. You are so right about it taking a long time to recover from a miscarriage. I have had 2…11 years apart, and I still think about those lost lives from time to time, and the first one was almost 14 years ago.
May you continue to draw your comfort and strength from our Heavenly Father.
Roan
I wish there were words strong enough to make the hurt, disappointment, sadness better. After being told by two specialists I would never have children, I have a wonderful and precious eight year old son (an answer to petition to a wonderful Heavenly Father – as we left it up to him rather than the doctors and/or their suggestions). Following Matthew, I had two miscarriages. There was nothing strong enough but the Father’s arms to take away the pain. And 6 years later when I think of my children who went home early, there is a sadness that can quickly overtake me. I then focus on my son – the impossibility by man’s standards, yet a strong reminder of a God who loves me and trusted my husband and I with this precious child, to train up to serve Him, and to love and who fills our lives with joy. I don’t know what the Lord has in my future – when we trust our lives to him rather than the world’s standards of “family planning” but I know this . . . God’s arms are still there for me when I need comfort and that fills me with even more love to pass on to our son. It gives me determination to look beyond tryig to understand and just continue in faith knowing that I have already been given so much. It has already been a conversation with our son who questions why he doesn’t have siblings and to share with him that even through heartbreak God is there to comfort us. I know God will continue to comfort you, Nathan and the rest of the Maxwell family during this time your heart is hurting. Thank you for reaching out and ministering to so many through your pain. The light and hope of Jesus shines brightly through you! You will continue to be in our prayers.
Melanie,
We are keeping you in our prayers. It is a process and God has blessed you to have such a loving family surrounding you during this time. I remember how important that was to me so many years ago. May God’s healing touch continue to surround you and comfort you.
Blessings, Mrs. Mari
Melanie, you have been in my thoughts all day today as I read about another miscarriage for you. My heart aches for you. You and Nathan have been through so much the past few years. May you sense our Heavenly Father carrying you through the coming days, weeks and months. He has you on a special journey, dear one. You are a testimony to me and many others. I have also experienced miscarragies – my 4th one was this past February, at 17 weeks along. What a comfort to read the blog comment about “tearfully, but joyfully populating heaven”.
But, the Lord has blessed us with two beautiful daughters (age 9 and 11)and they are so precious to me. While I have not understood these miscarriages, I trust in His plan for my life. It continues to be a process for me. 🙂 What a precious gift Abigail is to you all! Her little pictures on the blog are adorable. I will be praying for both you and Nathan. You are loved dear sister in Christ!
Melanie….
I am so sorry for your loss! You and your family are in my prayers! I pray that feel yourself wrapped in our Heavenly Father’s arms as you find comfort, peace and healing there, as only He can give!
Oh, but Melanie, it is YOU who are a testimony to us! I am so very sorry for your loss, a broken dream that is never forgotten. In the hard times you are having right now, you have blessed so many – it is so wonderful that you let God use you in that way. What an example to others. I have been where you are, and I am praying specifically for you…may the Lord continue to comfort you in the days ahead.
With Christ’s love, Stephanie
Continuing to pray for you all. You’ve been a wonderful testimony to me over the years. The Lord used you all to take me from complacency in my pregnancies and those of others (of course, they’ll be a baby at the end) to praying regularly for those babies. And, though I’ve never had a miscarriage, if that day comes, I know that what you’ve shared of the Lord’s working through your losses will be a blessing.
Melanie-22 years ago on Oct 29 we had Emily Ann. She was not to be on this earth. Still to this day we think of her and where she would be in life, what she would look like. It is a comfort to know she is in heaven and yet we still ponder her since she was a part of us.
I pray that your ponderings, as they come up, are directed to the Lord so He can give you His perspective. I think of Psalm 121. Read it if you get a chance. It will encourage you. I will continue to pray for you.
Dear Ones,
I am so saddened by not only your loss but the loss that the other ladies who have commented to you have also experienced. I know how deep the pain is. The gift of children is a wonderful gift. I know that everyone here appreciates it. The testimonies the ladies have given are precious and touching.
I can’t help but think that our Lord is AS DEEPLY saddened as we are when something like this happens. Remember when Jesus wept over the death of Lazareth? I know that He was feeling everyone’s deep pain. While we don’t WANT our Savior to hurt, somehow it is comforting that He knows our every pain.
Love in Christ to you all…and also to the ladies who comment.
Beth
“My strength is made perfect in weakness…for when I am weak, then am I strong.” (2 Cor. 12:9-10) May His grace and strength continue to fill your broken, empty heart in the days ahead and fill it as only He can.
My continued prayers and much love Melanie,
Jaynee
Nathan and Melanie,
Your story of courage and faith has inspired me to to worry less and trust more. Only God can provide the amazing peace that you are sharing with others and I appreciate your testimony. Two years ago my husband and I had two miscarriages in two months and I can honestly say I have never been more heartbroken. Even though it was difficult I can see that I grew so much more during our time of trial than I ever have when things are “as they should be.”
During my first miscarriage I was anxious about being alone when it was finally over. So, I prayed that God would show me a verse that would encourage me to be faithful even when I was alone. Somehow I found Psalm 13 and it comforted me more than I can say. Two years later, everytime I read it, I cry. Psalm 13:5 “But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, for he has been good to me.”
My husband and I are praying that God will pour his amazing comfort out on you and your family!
Nathan, Melanie and Abby –
I just heard about your loss and I had to drop you a note. So sorry to hear you are having to go through this. I am so sad to know that two wonderful, caring people have to go through this – know that I am thinking of each of you and little Abby. I know she brings everone joy!
Take care.
Stacey
We are so, so sorry for your loss. Thank you for your beautiful heart felt words. We have eight little ones in Heaven who all died through miscarriage and five children here with us on earth. I know your heartbreak and you will be in my prayers many times in the days to come.
Kim
Melanie,
Last year my husband and I lost our little baby in the first trimester. We had an early ultrasound that allowed us to see where our little one was developing, but then a week later God decided to take the little one home. To make things even more challenging, two of my friends became pregnant at the same time. I was happy for them, but it was hard to deal with sorrow that came from realizing my little one would have been making all of the milestones that theirs were meeting.
Month after month my husband and I hoped and prayed and waited to receive another of God’s blessings. By January, we were preparing to accept His will that our season for children was over. But we were wrong. A couple of weeks ago God blessed us with the safe arrival of our sweet little daughter. I know that even if we didn’t go through loosing our child before we still would be grateful, but because we did go through it I think we hug and hold her ever more closely and lovingly. And whenever I see a Mom or Dad enraptured with the love and care of their own blessing from God, my heart rejoices even more.
I pray that Jesus will continue to heal you and fill your heart with comfort and peace. I also pray that His Spirit will abide continuously over your family and home.
Dearest Nathan and Melanie,
I’m so sorry. Please know the H. family in Florida is praying for you. Thank you for your transparency…..it really is a blessing. And you know, my other children DID seem more precious to me after a loss. We aren’t promised tomorrow, yesterday is done, but we have TODAY. Hug her close for me and OH! did I enjoy seeing that sweater on her!! I loved making it….
Love to all,
Ana H. for the family
What a beautiful testimony you are Melanie. You all are in my heart and prayers. God is being glorified.
I sit here aching with you. I’ll keep it short because my baby is crying – my 9th baby … but I have 5 in heaven with my mother. I know the ache of loosing a child, of seeing a baby and crying because you should have one too. All of my losses were first trimester, but my arms still ache to hold them. Somehow, along the way, I’ve discoverd that by finding a child that I can watch grow up that is within a month or two or the one I lost helps a little. I’ve got 3 nieces and a nephew that I watch – and love on with all I can give. One is really my best friend’s daughter, but perhaps she is the dearest to my heart as she has learning disabilities and needs so much extra time and help. And somehow it helped when we suddenly lost my mom on mother’s day, to picture her in heaven holding those 6 grandchildren (my sister lost one too) on her lap.
I will be praying for you. And I will pray for God to comfort you – he is faithful. Thank you for your ministry.
Dear Melanie and Nathan,
I am truly sorry for your loss. I pray that God will comfort you. Thank you for sharing your loss, your heart and your precious faith in Jesus during this difficult time. I know God is using this for His glory.
Hugs and blessings,
Mrs. L
Dear Melanie,
I just read the Maxwell blog for the first time in over a month — and I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I’ll be praying for you as the Lord brings you to mind. You have a beautiful testimony of God’s grace in what you wrote, as well as beautiful testimonies of His grace all around you . . . in Abby, in your husband, in your faithful and loving family. May you feel each day that underneath you are the everlasting arms. “Be strong and of a good courage” — I know how hard it is to lose a baby, having had 8 miscarriages. But God does not rob us. He gives blessing upon blessing, and we can trust Him even when our eyes are so dimmed with tears that it is difficult to see His face. You will, in time, heal. And yet I am so thankful for the tears. The tears create a tender heart for children and for others that will bless those around you over and over again, and make you an especially grateful mother to all the children the Lord does send in the years ahead. May He send many to you, dear Melanie. Hold Abby tight, and delight yourself in Him who is the giver of every good and perfect gift.
Much love in Jesus,
Susie
Dear Melanie,
I too have faced miscarriage. My husband & I have been married for 13 years and our first 7 years were filled with infertility and 3 miscarriages. One day I found a verse that spoke to me personally “He maketh the barren to keep house, and to be a joyful mother of children. Praise ye the Lord.” Psalms 113:9. Not only does this verse say that I will keep house, but I will have more than one child! This verse has been fulfilled in my life, as I now have two sons Caleb (7), Joshua (3) and a daughter, Lydia (1). God truly has given me the desires of my heart. My only regret is that I spent so many years agonizing over my losses and watching the calendar making sure that I didn’t miss any “milestone” instead of just giving it over to God and trusting him completely. My children are dearer to me and my husand because when we hold them, we remember the days before we ever knew they were going to be born. Trust in him and he will bring it to pass. Love and prayers, Amanda
Dear Melanie, Nathan, and Abigail,
I am saddened to learn of your loss. I suffered through 3 miscarriatges in 2 years and could not afford medical care to learn why these happened. The Lord was good,as ever, and my husband and I were able to bring forth a daughter. You are in my prayers constantly, and I hope to read of a brother or sister for Abigail. Bless you and all the Maxwell family–
Karen N.
So sorry for your loss. I just miscarried my baby at 16 weeks. I delivered him on October 23rd and still don’t understand why. i don’t think i ever will and chose to believe that the lord knows best. So encouraging for me to read your letter and see how strong you are. I don’t feel very strong right now. It was two years ago nov.5th that I had my first misacriage. I know the Lord will see me through this time. I just don’t know how sometimes.
>>>>>>>
Bless you Susa. We are very sorry for your loss too and at 16 weeks. We will be praying for you.
Steve for the family
Dear Melanie,
What a blessing to read your blog post. Your strength obtained from the Lord really shone through when you shared what He is teaching you through this difficult time. It was encouraging to be reminded that I should always be aware of weaknesses and it when I think that “I know” that I have the greatest potential of failure. I really appreciated your humble spirit.
In Christ’s Love,
Katherine
Melanie
I was greatly blessed by your post. I just had my 6th miscarriage (this time it was twins) in July. I have never thought of it in the way you did as it being a “processâ€. I do know it is never easy and it takes time but I never thought of it that way before. I see now that I am still in that “process” and God is walking with me every step of the way. He is so faithful to magnify Himself in ways like your post. Thank you so much for being open and allowing the Lord to use you to bless me.
HIS†IS4US!
Melody M.
I was comment 19 above. After a week of a hazy nightmare, I was trying to clear out my Google Reader a little, and found this again, and found myself crying all over again. A week ago today, I came so close to loosing my best friend and my son and my new little daughter. My family came so close to loosing all 6 of us plus my best friend’s unborn child. As we were turning on our street for home, we were plowed into by an 18 wheeler. By some miracle, we survived. No, by hundreds of little miracles we have survived. My daughter has a long road ahead of her from her head injury but she is alive and responsive. God even sent me two big slices of pecan pie – a passing regret that I would miss the turkey and pecan pie and never thought about again until I saw the pie.
I just wanted you to know that I’ve not forgotten you. Your family is still often in our prayers and thoughts. I know the worst part comes when others begin to forget and the pain is still fresh for you.
Throughout this ordeal I chanted in my heart, “God will not give me more than I can handle.” and “All things work together”.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Bless you. Life can change in an instant. Praying for your daughter.
God bless.
Steve
Melanie, I read this post several weeks ago, and have been praying diligently for you and your family…but I have felt moved to come back and leave a personal note. I pray for strength, comfort, and patience for you during a difficult season. May your moments of grace and contentment in the Lord increase continually. I am certain there is great joy ahead for you and your family. With love and all good wishes –